WestHamFirm

Peter Parka · Fri May 18, 2007 8:58 pm Sheff Utd Call For Chelsea To Be Relegated

:lol:

Angry Sheffield Utd chairman Kevin McCabe called on the Premiership to dock Chelsea 'At least 60 points,' after it was revealed that Jose Mourinho had been arrested by police, following allegations that his Yorkshire Terrier lacked correct documentation.

'That dog was never properly registered,' fumed McCabe, 'And t'Premier League's doing nowt about it. My lads are sitting round t'dressing room, devastated by t'loss of their beloved Premiership place. It were bad enough when t'Premier League refused to dock points off those soft Southern bastards at Upton Park, for t'crime of having properly- registered foreign players who were much better than any that we could afford. But now they've gone and done it again. That dog were never properly registered, yet t'Premiership allowed Senyor Mooooriniyooh to continue managing 'is cloob. And to make matters worse that dog were a bloody Yorkie an' all! The sooner Chelsea are docked 60 points and relegated, the sooner we can get back to playing crap, negative football in t'Premiership, where we believe we belong.'

McCabe's stance has been backed by Wigan chairman 'Honest' Dave Whe*an. 'It's about time t'London-based mafia of poncey Sooouthern cloobs showed some consideration to us 'umble Northern lads, who've worked our way oop from t'bottom wi' nowt but graft, more graft and the odd spot o' price-fixing to help us on us way. You Cockneys don't oonderstand what it's like oop here, living on t'diet of black pudding, roast whippet, mushy peas an' chips. Now that all t'pits and t'mills and t'factories have closed, there's nowt to do but race pigeons and bash Pakis an' we need our football clubs as t'only source of pride and hope. Football is t'heart of community here, which is proved by t'fact that we soomtimes get crowds of up to 14 people at my wonderful JJB combination football stadium and shopping centre on t'fashionable outskirts of Wigan.'

As a brass band struck up the plaintive tones of the old Rod Stewart hit, 'We are whining, We are whining, All the way, Down t'League,'
Mccabe and Whe*an got down on their knees and begged for one last chance. 'If Premier League could see its way clear to docking points from every ooother team in t'Premiership, we might actually finish in t'top half o't'table. It's our right. It's our demand. It's t'only fooking chance we've ever got.'

Sam1 · Fri May 18, 2007 9:11 pm

:D :D

Superb lmfao

:D :D

oldhammer1966 · Sat May 19, 2007 12:49 pm

:lol: :lol: :lol:

FUNNY

skingirl_23 · Sat May 26, 2007 12:29 pm

That's excellent. ha ha

MsAnnaRak · Tue May 29, 2007 12:51 am

:twisted: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

Ha, ha, ha

Scary thing is it's not exactly to hard to imagine him actually saying something along these lines, the amount of shit that consistently dribbles from his mouth!!

burythecat · Tue May 29, 2007 8:16 am

what is with him and people/dogs not being registered?

Dave_whufc · Tue Jun 05, 2007 8:06 pm

crowds of up to 14 :lol:

happyhammer · Sat Jun 09, 2007 12:21 am

lol :lol: